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I took the back seat to girlfriends, friends, and social outings - all because I allowed him that position of power over me.
I'll admit there are situations where I still get uncomfortable being as feminine as I am; like at a super bowl party!
I still feel a little uneasy around so much masculine energy, and I don't believe it's because I'm scared to be judged, I think it has more to do with the fact that I just don't fit in with the box society says I'm supposed to and as much as I don't care for "the norms" of society, a part of me still hears everyone telling me that I act like a girl.
I've never been more comfortable with myself or in a better state of mind than I am now, so I can't help but look back and wonder if so many gay men settle for a similar situation to the one I was in because they are blinded by all these insecurities.
Why have I seen so many gay men let someone build them up and smash them down when it's convenient for that person?
Is that adolescent still haunting us, the one that doesn't fit in?