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The same is true for when you meet someone who is good for you, like I did with the man I am married to now. Not just sitting back and observing the man he was showing himself to be.
I was projecting onto him my fears that he was another abusive man. I was trying to end it before he left me, which I was convinced was going to happen.
He’d suggest I wear different clothes, or that he didn’t like my friends. I was seeing only the things that confirmed my dream of a wonderful life with him. My ‘baby girl’ can be beautiful in a loving relationship.
Abusers seek to gain control over their victims by manipulating or dominating them.
At its core, dating and relationship violence is about one person misusing power to control another person.
First, as I’ve talked in more depth about earlier, I knew I had to look deep into why my self-esteem was so low.
They promise you a wonderful life of marriage, babies and growing old together. When we are lacking self-esteem and vulnerable, this is music to our ears. Narcissists instinctively spot our weakness and are experts at filling it with words they know we want to hear.
From survivor to success in life, career and long-term, healthy love.