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Many of these qualities won’t be apparent to us when we first meet someone, but as we get to know the people we date, these are invaluable traits to both look for in them and to strive for in ourselves. Maturity This statement is not meant to echo the ever-advised mantra that maturity is important.
Being “grown up” isn’t merely a matter of not acting like a kid anymore.
An ideal partner is thus willing to reflect on his or her history and is interested in understanding how old events inform current behaviors.
When people mature emotionally, they are less likely to re-enact or project past experiences onto their current relationships.
Instead, they’re looking for someone to share life with as equals and to appreciate independently of themselves.